“God bless you, dear Queen Bess!
May nothing you dismay
But health, and peace, and happiness,
Be yours, this Christmas-day.”
In 1868, the American literary landscape was rocked by the release of Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women, proving once and for all that women’s stories can be just as boring as men’s. A revolutionary portrait into the lives of four gnashing harpies and the betas that loved them, Alcott’s work has stood the test of time: beloved by some, tolerated by all.
Today, we heave this conveniently-public domain property into 2025, via the only method that could possibly improve this classic work: gamification.
In this newsletter, we will be rewriting Little Women, page-by-page, adhering as best we can to the original text, save for one wrinkle:
YOU will choose who dies.
THE RULES
Every newsletter will REWRITE ONE PAGE of Little Women
Any new characters on that page will get added to THE DEATH POLL.
You, the reader, will be able to VOTE TO KILL A CHARACTER on the DEATH POLL.
At the end of a chapter, the character with the most votes will be REMOVED FROM THE STORY.
The writer must adapt the story to accommodate this ABSCENCE.
BETH CANNOT DIE.
In the leadup to the first page, I’ll be sharing some thoughts and explaining the rules a bit more. SUBSCRIBE to join the journey!
You wail: “When will the culling begin? When, oh when will my bloodlust be sated??”
Worry not, dear one.
(^That’s a link to a voting survey. Just to be perfectly clear.^)
LAUNCHING CHRISTMAS EVE 2025